Obligations

Suddenly I feel very obligated to post a real entry.

Then it's 2am and i think i'm lonely.

I feel that songs affect our thinking and our cerebellum alot.

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It's been a while since I've bought kuri grill. I'm actually missing the times where I can sit and watch a 2 hour movie with a chicken with all the mayonnaise and barbecue sauce in the world. I know this will make you angry but I'm just too tired to put anything up.

Guilt overtakes us so easily sometimes and very often it becomes the driving force in everything we do. The sense of obligation is so easily assumed as true responsibility. Alot of times in life we do what we see people do, we listen to what people listen. Alot more times, I look forward and I see dread and storms.

I am very jealous of people who have found their way out, their refuge, their haven. I am more jealous of people who took the ultimate (albeit wrong) way out. I imagine myself standing infront of the examiner and it shakes me to my core. Multiply that by 1,000 and we get a suicider. Songs have been my output recently, it seems like people like Aerosmith and Lifehouse and Luther Vandross wrote the essence of my being(although I should know better).

I've not touched my guitar for 2 weeks now. I look at the bass guitar with stress drenched with guilt. We know that most bad things happen in our lives are due to our own actions. I can count with my 10 fingers the things that I could have avoided doing that will change my life 180*. I bet you can. I miss the times where I can write songs and poems and dedicate it to the world.

I wonder sometimes how people keep their passion burning when they're so many fire hoses around.

Perhaps ... .... ... ... ... ... .... .
or
Maybe . .... .... ... ... ...., ... ... ... .